Yes, that’s a joke. Celebrity stalking is illegal and also a bit silly. But, you know you're going to have friends in town this summer who will be all like "oooh, where can I see celebrities?!" Being the jaded Angeleno that you are, you will have to balance not caring with delivering the goods to the star-struck. So, we've got your list for some friendly celebrity stalking tips. And yes again, that’s Turtle from the Entourage shoot at the Farmers Market (please pay us TMZ).

When you've just gotta see someone famous, you have a few options:

Find Film/TV/Commercial Shoots: Sadly, you can no longer get a free list of local shooting sites. You can thank Osama BL for screwing you out of your celebrity sighting. Since 9/11, safety concerns have removed this information from the public eye. The info won't be handed to you, but sites like On Location Vacations try to track shoots. If you hit the site at the right moment, you may just get lucky. Also, if you look carefully around LA, you’ll see a bunch of small, brightly colored signs with what look like code and an arrow. Many of these are trail markers for cast and crew. If you follow them, you may just get lucky and stumble onto a big shoot. You could also end up discovering a diaper ad.

Go to Tapings: Celebrities tend to turn up at the shows they star in. Not always, but usually. So, you can try to get tickets from the folks handing them out on the Venice Boardwalk, Hollywood Walk of Fame, or the Third Stree Promenade. If that seems like a lot of effort, you could also go through sites like Audiences Unlimited or TVtix for entry. Be aware that you'll probably spend at least an hour waiting to get in (probably more) and will likely be committed through several run-throughs of the show. If you're on vacation it's not a bad way to spend a day, but it can be a serious time commitment.

Be An Extra: What's better than seeing a celebrity? Getting paid to see one, of course. You could try your luck at being an extra. Sites like Be In A Movie, Extra Casting, and Central Casting are clearinghouses for this type of work (union and non-union). If you've been following the news, you know that sometimes fees are charged for the placement (and that it's a controversial practice). Be a bit careful when pursuing this route because there are a fair number of unscrupulous individuals willing to take your money and not provide work in exchange.

Use Social Media: There is a whole twitterverse dedicated to providing up to the second information. We're guessing with a little searching you could use sites like PopSugar, or of course Twitter, to track down the famous.

And finally, please remember, when you and your pals do accidentally/on-purpose bump into a celeb, be considerate. Celebrities are people too.

P.S. You could also be lame and just go to where movies were shot awhile ago. Cheap thrills anyone?

Special thanks to ChaosBum for being the muse to this article.